My dad died almost exactly a year ago. He and my mom had been married for more than 50 years. They had three children, and during the course of their long marriage, as a result of luck and thrift, they amassed not insignificant assets, enough, in fact to lead one to make the question of whether the "death tax" is going to reset in 2011 a matter of some interest. My mom is herself almost 80, and like many people in long marriages, she had become accustomed to letting my dad take all the responsibility for certain tasks, while she took the responsibility for other tasks.
It was a traditional marriage, and they had more-or-less traditional roles. She cooked and kept the house clean and he did the taxes and kept track of investments.
He was also the guy who did the mysterious things that have to be done when the relatives died, the one you sent the will to, and said "could you help with this?". His mom died, he got the auctioneers to clear the house out of everything that nobody wanted, paid the debts, sold the house, disbursed the proceeds, my uncle, my other grandfather, my college-age nephew, my other uncle, ditto ditto ditto. My dad knew about probate, and death certificates, and how to arrange for pension transfers.
It's bad when the go-to guy for dead relatives dies.